The Adventures of Ninja Phil – Ep 4 – Pirate Patients

 

Blog #14 - 04.05.2014

Welcome Ninja fans! The next chapter in the story and as promised, this week sees a special post written by the very nurse who you see pictured above. Enjoy (I did) and come back next to see how she gets out of this pickle and whether Ninja Phil can get there in time to save her!

Phil

***************

You may think that pirates masquerading as patients on a hospital ward is a far-fetched notion. But I am here to testify to you that there are many different hidden identities found in the most unlikely of places, even in hospitals, many of which have been touched upon in this blog.

For example, (and this is in all seriousness) I had a patient adamantly proclaim that she was a leprechaun. Even when challenged she didn’t back down. She was a leprechaun, and even had a pot of gold, although she had no idea where to find it… To add strength to her argument, she was Irish too, which solidified her claim. This Leprechaun was very religious too. After giving her a large calcium and vitamin tablet (probably about the size of a 50 pence piece) and mistaking it for a piece of wafer bread, she lifted it above her head and announced: ‘It is time to partake of the Holy Communion.’ At which point she broke it in two…

If the thought of hidden pirates and leprechauns didn’t shock you enough, I’ve even witnessed some of the most deadly of all creatures admitted as patients to the hospital … hidden NINJA!! When they wheeled the lady in question onto the ward she seemed sedate and pleasant. Oh, how wrong we were! For she was truly a deadly opponent! As darkness crept onto the ward, she struck. Being bereft of her chosen weapon, she pulled the plug out of the wall and spun it with great ferocity, like a flail or nunchuks, at any who dared approached her.

Another such incident occurred (once again during the dead of night) as we were checking on our patients. In the darkness we realised that one of them was missing from his bed. We searched for some time, but no one seemed able to find him. Until I noticed him, slowly creeping out from behind the curtains and walking silently up to behind one of the staff out on the corridor. He slowly lifted his hands towards the back of her head and then… he clapped his hands three times as hard as he could. Suffice to say, the nurse in question gave out a satisfying scream and the patient then went back to bed quite willingly, obviously completing the task he had been set out to do.

As a more serious end thought, even though a nursing profession is difficult and exhausting, you can find that there is a hidden within every patient an individual identity (although maybe not all pirates, leprechauns or ninjas). But when you take the time and put all the pieces together (as the gorgeous, talented and amazing nurse in the comic did here 😉 ), these identities can be uncovered and fully appreciated, making the job much more rewarding and fulfilling… and maybe when facing a gang of patient pirates (or should I say pirate patients?) it might be the thing that gives you the time to save your life… or not…

Have a great week and may the fourth be with you,

Harri 😀  

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