Ninja and Pizza


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A few weeks ago I posted a copy of Ninja Phil’s government profile and promised that at a later date I would expand on some of the background of our Hero. Well today is one of those days. Most of you will be more familiar with the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles’ obsession with Pizza (one reason for their being in the pic today, the other being their new film out later this year which I’m looking forward to). But unbeknownst to many of you will be that the association of Pizza with Ninja goes much further than the sewers of New York and just like his Mutant co-workers Teenage Mormon Ninja Phil also shares a liking for this particular type of Italian cuisine.

There are 3 reasons why this affinity exists between Ninja and Pizza which I’ll now try and explain: 

1. Keeping Your Hands Clean

First and foremost the Pizza is Italy’s answer to the humble Sandwich (or was the Sandwich England’s answer to the Pizza… not sure? Any food historians out there??) The Pizza with its conveniently positioned crust, free from delicious but potentially messy toppings, provides one with a way to consume the tomatoes, mozzarella and pepperoni (or any other choice of topping) without getting your hands dirty.

Such convenience makes it the ideal food for Ninja. It’s simple to eat on the move and prevents the Ninja from having his hands covered in Tomato puree. 

However, the Ninja favours the Pizza because it epitomises an attribute which they themselves possess. Just as thousands have picked up the phone to order a Pizza, there are those who have ordered Ninja in order to save their hands from getting dirty (if you get my meaning). This has often led Ninja to being asked to do some quite unsavoury things (like emptying bins) but such a lifestyle gives them an appreciation for the humble slice of Pizza.

2. Versatility

It is universally acknowledged that Pizza is one of the most versatile of food stuffs. The variety of toppings is truly staggering. From the healthy Vegetable to the crazy Meat Feast; from simple Margherita to the exotic Hawaiian; everyone has a different preference. But regardless of likes or dislikes there’s a Pizza out there for you (unless of course you don’t like the Cheese and Tomato base, in which case you have my pity). But it’s not just tastes that the Pizza caters for, it’s also the moment. The unbelievable range of Pizza toppings can give you something not matter what mood you’re in.

Just as the Pizza is versatile, so is the Ninja. The Ninja can adapt to different situations and problems, no matter what the occasion the Ninja has an answer. The simple staggering array of weaponry that a Ninja has recourse to demonstrates this: Katana, Nunchukus, Bo Staff, Sai (as demonstrated by the Mutant Turtles) or simply their own body. The Ninja and the Pizza are paramount examples of versatility.

3. Universally Available

Once upon a time, Italy was the only place that Pizza could be reliably found. Now Pizza is the universal food, everywhere one goes Pizza is there. When I was in Israel our default food of choice, and the easiest to find (following Bagels and Falafel), was Pizza (there was a great little place just round the corner from the Jaffa Gate).

Likewise, once upon a time, Japan was the only place that Ninja could be found. Now Ninja can be found everywhere (if one knows where to look), thus wherever Pizza is to be found so are Ninja. Equally as creatures of the night Ninja make great part time delivery boys when they get bored with conventional Ninja activities.

And as such it shouldn’t be a surprise that Leonardo, Donatello, Michelangelo, Raphael and Ninja Phil, as well as Ninjas all over the world find that Pizza is their food of choice. So if you’re feeling peckish this week order a Pizza and spend a moment of your life living like a Ninja…

Although let me give this one piece advice… if you see this Rat at the shop…

the Pizza is good. If you see a rat like this one….

I’d avoid the place like the plague, haha…



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